If you love the Birthday Cake Cookies you get at The Great American Cookie Company, you’ll love this recipe! They taste identical for a fraction of the price.
It’s desperate. It truly is. It’s a whole day of hitting and pinching and saying no to anything that doesn’t involve cookies. Sometimes I wonder if she’s really working alone. Is there some kind of toddler Facebook group they communicate on? Because this whole assault on my mental health feels incredibly organized.
It’s a consistent schedule of rejecting what she demanded for breakfast just a few moments earlier — always in favor of some random, elusive item. Red and green chocolate chips buried in my baking cupboard from Christmas? A tiny jar of fancy mustard I’ve had since 2004? Honestly, it’s like she’s Beyonce. One of these days she’ll demand that her apple juice be diluted with water melted from the iceberg that hit the Titanic. I won’t even flinch, you guys. That’s how worn down I am.
Then of course, there’s Getting Dressed Drama. It’s like I haven’t been putting clothes on her every morning for her entire life. Does she have clothes amnesia? Is getting dressed so upsetting that she blocks out the trauma? I stand there like some kind of toddler clothes saleswoman, trying to sell my 2 year old on why clothes are good, pointing out how BEAUTIFUL Elsa’s hair is on her $9 Target t-shirt, look at how BADLY Doc McStuffins wants her to wear this sweatshirt with her face on it!
I’ve lost any trace of pride I might have had, every day by 10 am.
This alone is enough to explain why I drink wine and have crazy eyes. But do you want to know the very worst part?
Lucy acts like a perfect angel for everyone else.
Just once, I want to come home to my husband, her Gram, her babysitter — and see that defeated look in their eyes. Lucy standing triumphantly in the center of the living room — she’ll be naked, lipstick smeared on her pudgy belly, fourteen sparkly headbands stacked atop her messy hair. Perhaps an entire bag of Goldfish crackers will have been dumped on the floor, ground into the carpet like orange sand as she walked on them wearing boots she stole from my closet.
At that moment, I’ll start to feel a trace of pity. But only for a moment. Because pity will be replaced with overwhelming triumph as they utter those seven magic words.
“I don’t know how you do it.”
Is that selfish of me? I mean…probably.
But the heart wants what the heart wants.
Lucy Goose is a huge fan of those crazy expensive cookies at the mall. Anytime we go shopping, we can’t walk by without stopping for one or four. And I use the term “walk” loosely — I’m usually pushing an empty stroller while she runs ahead wildly, giving me heart palpitations but making old people everywhere swoon at the adorableness.
The last time we stopped, she immediately pointed at their sprinkled Birthday Cake Cookies. I had never tried one, so we split it. And while it was very good…I also knew I could recreate them at home for a fraction of the cost.
So, I did! And these are pretty darn fabulous.
- 3 cups all-purpose flour
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 cup salted butter, (2 sticks), softened
- 1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
- 3/4 cup packed light-brown sugar
- 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- 2 large eggs
- 1 1/2 cups white chocolate chips
- 1 1/2 cups rainbow sprinkles (I prefer the ice cream sprinkles -- they are with the ice cream toppings at your grocery store. They come in a larger container than regular sprinkles and are crunchy!)
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line baking sheets with parchment paper. In a medium-large bowl, stir flour and baking soda together. Set aside.
- Beat butter and sugars with your electric mixer on medium speed until pale and fluffy, about 1 minute. Beat in eggs, 1 at a time, and then vanilla extract. Reduce speed; gradually add flour mixture, and mix until just combined. Add white chocolate chips and mix until combined.
- Scoop dough using a medium-sized cookie scoop. Roll tops and sides of cookies in sprinkles, then place on prepared baking sheets, 2 inches apart. Bake for about 12 minutes, until edges are golden brown. Let cool on racks for several minutes, then remove to cookie sheet to cool completely.
These are so great — party in cookie form! They’re soft and chewy and taste like a birthday!
Enjoy and have a great day!