Toffee Whopper Oatmeal Cookies

One thing that you might not know about me is that I am a creature of habit.

I like stability.

Cleanliness.

Order.

It’s probably the thing that my husband loves the most AND least about me at the same time.

One one hand, he always comes home to a clean (or mostly clean) house. I fix my hair and put make-up on every day.  We are always on time to wherever we need to be.

But on the other hand, the slightest change in our ordinary routine throws me completely off guard.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SOMEONE IS COMING OVER IN AN HOUR OMG I NEED TO GO PRACTICE CONVERSATION STARTERS IN THE MIRROR AND HELLLOOOO WE’RE OUT THE BEST FLAVORS OF KOOL AID.

I’m like the easiest/hardest person to live with ever.

So, it comes as no surprise that this move has thrown me for a complete loop.

Not that it isn’t wonderful living amongst civilization, but seriously, it’s just too many changes at once.

I mean, our new house has an upstairs which I am totally not used to. So when I lay in bed at night, I know that there is a whole other half-house underneath me and there could be a serial killer lying in wait and eating Oatmeal Cream Pies in my kitchen and I don’t even know it.

Also, co-workers of my husband that we USED to live an hour away from can now just stop by at a moment’s notice.

And the other day I went to Sams Club and, like normal, was stocking up on butter like it was the beginning of the dairy apocalypse.  But then I remembered that I could always get more, it’s only a five minute drive.

It’s a whole new way of thinking.

So anyways, all of this came to a head last week in a Schlotzsky’s Deli, where I had to discard half of my uneaten sandwich and run outside before I had a giant panic attack.

And in between heaving sobs and deep breaths, I tried to explain to my husband that on top of the new house and having to deal with real people coming over, I had just realized that spending our Summer moving meant that we didn’t take a family vacation and school was about to start and I hadn’t taken my kid to do anything fun.  So probably, I was the worst mom ever and in very real jeopardy of losing my title as #1 Mom In All the Land.

(I know that you’re probably confused because you thought that title was yours, but my son awarded it to me like 5 years ago and he always tells the truth)

But then my husband and I worked out a People Coming Over Agreement (how much notice needed, etc) and he reassured me that although we hadn’t gone anywhere cool this Summer, I do invent my own raps and keep a really awesome candy drawer, so I’m probably going to hang on to my #1 Mom title for awhile at least.

After I finally calmed down and turned back into a sane, normal, functioning human being, I realized what is necessary for a new house to feel like a home–cookies in the oven.

So I made some. And life is good again. The End.

(click here for printable recipe)

INGREDIENTS

2 sticks margarine

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1/2 cup packed brown sugar

2 eggs

1 (3.4 oz) box instant vanilla pudding mix

2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1 cup quick oats

2 1/4 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

2 teaspoons baking soda

1 cup Whoppers, chopped coarsely

1 cup toffee bits

In the bowl of a mixer, beat margarine and sugars on medium until fluffy, about 2 minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, beating until well mixed after each. Add pudding mix and vanilla and beat until mixed.

In a medium bowl, combine oats, flour, salt, and baking soda. Add to the butter mixture in the bowl and beat until combined. Fold in Whoppers and toffee.

Drop by large spoonfuls (I did two small cookie scoops worth of dough for each) on ungreased cookie sheets and bake for about 12 minutes or until edges turn golden brown. Let set on sheet for about 3 or 4 minutes and then remove to a cooling rack.

Makes about 2 dozen large cookies.

These cookies are amazing–chewy and completely delicious.  I hope you love them!!

Have a wonderful Thursday!!