Breaking Dawn (Twilight) Cake
Okay, so I enjoy a good vampire show as much as the next person.
Twilight, True Blood, Anita Blake, whatever. If there is a book or movie about hot vampires, there is a strong likelihood I will be reading or watching with fascination.
But seriously. I really don’t understand women who like…want to be in a relationship with an ACTUAL vampire.
Helllloooo, that’s scary.
First of all, I don’t like blood. I mean…gross. I avoid my husband’s breath after a cup of coffee, I can’t imagine how I’d handle a good whiff of blood breath.
Sick-o. For real.
Also, vampires are cold. So who would I put my cold feet on at night? Not that I’d be able to sleep anyways, what with worrying about being drained of my blood as soon as I shut my eyes.
I mean, I can barely handle being married to a real human.
Sometimes after watching a particularly disturbing episode of Forensic Files or 48 Hours Mystery, I get really paranoid at my husband and I’m all “do you have a secret insurance policy on me,” and he’s all, “no,” and I’m all, “YOU DO AND YOU WANT TO MURDER ME TELL THE TRUTH AND BY THE WAY I TOTALLY HAVE A NOTE IN A SEALED ENVELOPE ADDRESSED TO THE POLICE, POINTING TO YOU AS MY KILLER SO YOU ARE GOING DOWN”.
Then he shakes his head and goes to bed, probably waiting on an apology but everyone knows that you don’t apologize to a murderer so whatever.
So yeah… a relationship with a vampire probably wouldn’t work for me.
Also, do you think vampires know how to text? Do they have a Facebook?
Probably not.
Pretty sure I never saw Edward Cullen checking his Facebook status.
Just saying.
How are you supposed to communicate or share your feelings if you can’t text or Facebook each other??
Are you supposed to actually sit down and TALK?! Clearly that would never work.
So…listen. Just face it. Humans and vampires are not meant to have relationships.
Okay?
Just find yourself a nice human husband who you can accuse of wanting to murder you, stalk his Facebook profile, and blow up his phone with a steady stream of text messages.
That’s what I do, and I can assure you that it works just great.
Anyways, this cake was not MY birthday cake, but a cake I made for a dear friend of mine who LOVES Twilight.
Not just loves.
LOVES.
You can find the Tuxedo Cake recipe on THIS post. Tuxedo Cakes are super easy and look so elegant, they are one of my favorites when I want something quick and impressive.
Instead of using whipped cream, I just frosted this cake with white buttercream and let it chill for about an hour before I topped with the chocolate glaze. I added black gel food coloring to the glaze and topped with chess pieces I made using THIS mold and red and white candy melts.
Super easy, I swear.
Make this for the vampire lover in your life. Or yourself. Whatever.
Happy Wednesday!!
Thanks for visiting my blog! I realize you could be doing more important things with your time. Like watching the news or washing socks. I hope you stay awhile. Much more fun than socks, I promise. 
I love it! I'm a sucker for Twilight :)
I love your posts, they always brighten my day. While I don't much care for the Twilight movies (never read the books) however, this cake, is awesome!
What is Twilight?
I enjoy reading your posts! thanks for sharing :)
GORGEOUS cake! I'm sure a Twilight lover would go all, like, pale and sparkly over it! ;-)
And I'm with you. Vampires = NO.
LOVE LOVE LOVE this cake, this post made me LOL several times. Between blood breath and sealed letters to police, I think you've made the right choice :)
Kristan this is AWESOME!!!! you amaze me!! this is the BEST Twilight cake I've seen!!
BTW… beautiful cake. :)
I've never seen any of the Twilight movies. Truth. Nor have I read the books. I hope we can still be friends. Regardless, I like your cake. Those chess pieces are fantastic!
OMG, you are soo funny I love reading your posts!
http://www.cookielouisepleaze.blogspot.com
I don't know anything about Twilight other than for awhile it made my daughter act crazy wanting to stand in long lines in the middle of the night to buy books and see movies, but I love the cake and I love reading your posts.
I was a huge Twi-hard (it's not often I get to use that terrible slang term but I thought it was fitting) until the vamps of Bon Temps entered my life. Totally different stories, yes, but sex sells (and Bill and Eric are precisely that) and I was SOLD.
Your cake almost looks fake, it's THAT perfect.
Wow….this is SO cool! You have to bring one to Cheryl at Blissdom! ;)
Love the picture!! And LOVE Twilight. When I look at the cake, twilight comes to mind. Great job and I bet it will taste awesome! Have a great day :o)
LOL – I just didn't get it until my teenage girls finally convinced me to sit down and watch the twilight saga this week… saw the first, second, and third movies in the last 48 hours. Now I can't decide who I'm rooting for – Jacob or Edward. I'm totally hooked and can't wait to see the fourth. DON'T TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS!!!
:)
ButterYum
:)
ButterYum
Such a lovely Tuxedo Cake lady! You totally nailed it. The chess pieces also look perfect! Will Breaking Dawn just come out in theaters already? I can't believe they're braking it into parts! I might lose my marbles… more so.
breaking*
I'm so with you on the vampire business! Looks like were in the same boat on it all. I will say though, that I can see the allure of a vampire, for those who like to live on the edge!
Fantastic cake! I'll be doing SOMETHING come release for Breaking Dawn!
1. That cake is amazing. I'll have to try out your tuxedo cake recipe for my friend's wedding cake she wants me (me????) to make for her!
2. I love the way you write! I "HAAH!"'d quite a few times at work while reading this. :)
LOL, I never apologize either. fantastic cake.
LOL Like always you crack me up! Gorgeous cake by the way! I am def making this recipe!
I do adore a good vampire story myself. My goddaughter would go crazy over your cake. :) You did an awesome job!
I just love your posts! You always have a great story to put with your recipes, and I enjoy it. It always brightens my day. :) This cake is TOO cute! Thanks for sharing!
That is awesome. Especially since there was no whiney Bella or a gross birth of a half demon child. Just cake.
seriously cracking up!! I mean really I would miss warming up my toes on my poor unsuspecting husband.
ah you gave me a great laugh this morning! thanks for that.
Also, thanks for the pointer to tuxedo cake – it's one of my favourites but I always thought it would be really difficult.
I hate Twilight. But I love the post. So, so funny! And such a gorgeous cake! :)
Great job!! So glad I really enjoy your blog. :)
I never liked vampires either – but my sister loves the Twilight movies & after a harsh break-up I wanted to throw her the perfect twi-party & this is what I came up with: http://alisonswonderscraporium.blogspot.com/2011/01/when-you-can-live-forever-what-can-you.html
I must say, I probably had more fun than I should have but who can argue with good looking men – vampire or wolf?! lol Just heart your blog btw – we have a lot in common!
Haha, I totally cracked up reading this post. And even though I'm not really into all the vampire stuff, I think this cake looks amazing!
Twilight has escaped me thus far, but that cake is so perfect looking! I love the frosting.
You should enter my lamington contest!
(First time here btw – will be back!)
Love Edward. Love the cake. Coffee breath not so much…unless it's MY coffee breath, which I happen to have every day since I also love coffee.
Swooning so hard for this cake. Om nom!
LOVE it!! And love the post too! Made me laugh! I also love to watch vampire stuff- especially The Vampire Diaries, cause someday Ian Somerhalder will find me and want to marry me. (ha! Good thing my hubby doesn't know about that obsession!!!) And if you like to read books like that, you HAVE to read the Mortal Instruments Series!! It's not primarily vampires, but it's soooooo good!!!
Oh my goodness. My sides are hurting from laughing so hard! Love the cake by the way.
I love this cake!! Gorgeous!! New follower and loving your blog.
-Marci
http://www.balancingstilettosandscrubs.com
Your cake is 100% gorgeous!
I don't really get the whole vampire thing either..don't get me wrong, I have read all the books and seen all the movies, but an ETERNITY together? That's a little more than I am willing to give ;)
you are completely certifiably hysterical; i think you could totally be a stand-up comic! such a fun cake!
I've never seen the movies nor read the books, just not my thing, but this cake! Wow, it is a thing of beauty for sure and your friend is going to be blown away.
Your write up was laugh-out-loud funny!
YOU ARE HILARIOUS! I love your posts!!!! hehehe I shared your post about the man w the backpack at the door at 8am with my husband! heheheh I couldn't finish explaining because I was laughing so hard!! Can't wait to share todays!!! Love your sense of humor, keep the posts coming!
OH, and I love the cake. I did a Twilight themed bday party for my sis-in-law in Nov! I wish I would have had this idea then :) I will have to make it for her, just because!
Haha…Had a great time reading your blog!
Love it! Very beautiful : D
I LOVE this Twilight cake! I am more a fan of the books than the movie! But I loved your analogy of having a Vampire Boyfriend and how your husband is a murderer I do that all the time to my fiance! I was laughing so hard! I love your blog! Please check mine out I am new but am posting pictures of cupcakes and cakes! http://ohtheplacesfallingup.blogspot.com/
P.S. I also posted a link to your blog in my newest blog http://ohtheplacesfallingup.blogspot.com/2011/01/trip-back-to-last-year.html check it out!
OMG this post made me crack up! Too funny and the cake is GORGEOUS
I'm not even a Twilight fan (sorry!) but this looks awesome. Great post!
HI! Just wanted to let you know that I awarded you the Stylish Blogger Award! Hope you'll accept, the details are on my blog at http://www.bentofabulous.com
p.s. LOVE the cake!!
Ha ha ha I'm so gonna make your cake just so I have a conversation started to talk about this post!
I'm out hopping, hope you'll come by Lucy's when you get a chance http://closertolucy.blogspot.com/2011/01/lets-go-to-weekend-hop.html
I just made this cake and it so yummy!! It's my new favorite cake!! I did a whip cream topping and made 2 layers, and some cupcakes from the cake with a buttercream topping!! Everyone loved it!
this is awesome. and hilarious. and awesome. and again, hilarious.
nothing more awesome then a geeky vampire cake, i"ll tell you what :)
love your blog! this is super funtasmic
-meg
@http://clutzycooking.blogspot.com
@http://myscribblednotebook.blogspot.com
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this cake and i can’t seem to find a recipe for it….I think i may be recipe search challenged. I have a friend who’s birthday is the week of the Breaking Dawn opening and i would love to make her this cake. If you could send me the recipe i would be “eternally” thankful.
Not only pretty, the cake looks DELICIOUS!! I just wanted to let you know, I featured this on my blog today: http://vixenmade.blogspot.com/2011/11/free-printable-friday-twilight-saga.html
[...] because of how dramatic and gorgeous they look with a small amount of effort. I made one for Breaking Dawn, some gorgeous strawberry topped cupcakes, aHot Fudge Whopper Birthday Cake for my husband AND some [...]
[...] can get the recipe by clicking through to the Cookbook Queen’s blog. Pin It Share this on: Mixx Delicious Digg Facebook [...]
So pretty! My daughter is a huge Twilight fan and would love this!
[...] Source : Confessions of a cookbook queen [...]